Reflections from week 3…

For: The Institute Of Contemporary And Emerging Worship Studies, St. Stephen’s University, Essentials Green Online – Spring ‘09 Worship Theology Course with Dan Wilt

I find that the simple things in our life sometimes get the back burner.  We can get so distracted in the duties of daily life that expecting anything to happen or change in our walk with the Lord seems obsolete.  Really believing that the Lord will move in our lives can be hard to grab a hold of.  For me, yeah I believe that the Lord can come and “rescue” for lack of a better word, me from a situation or even come and love on me when my heart seems to be withered, but to be honest I do not expect it very much.  Perhaps it is a feeling of unworthiness or not good enough.  I think that that feeling can disperse itself into a congregation as well.  We are a bunch of unworthy people feeling like we don’t deserve anything.  We can run down the list of things that we have done, the evil that lives in the crevices in our lives.  But Jesus didn’t come to save the “Have it all together” people, he came to bring life to what we think should be buried in the ground.

[1] After all, why would we expect God to respond to the indifferent heart, the soul that is going through the motions of preparation without any evident hunger in their spirit? Dan said exactly what I was thinking.  I know sometimes when I have lead or even just played with the band, I just went through the motions instead of preparing my heart and asking the Lord to come among us.  I know that if we get wrapped up on what we ‘Haven’t’ done then we set ourselves up for failure.  Just realize that we fallen short of what that Lord wants, repent and come back to the cross.

I think I could go on forever with this so I will just leave it at that.

[1]  Wilt booklet week 3

Essentials Red Project

Here is a song I wrote for the class.  I wrote this when thinking about the times that I have just gone through the motions of expressing myself in worship and not really making them come from my heart.  So here is my song asking my Long Time Love where he has gone.  The MP3 follows, hopefully.  Yay, I get to be vulnerable.

Long time love, so far away

We used to run, we used to play

Now no ones here to stay

And no ones coming this way

Where have you gone?

Where have you gone?

It’s been a long time since I’ve held you

It’s been a long time love

Long time love so far away

With your bright and shinny day

Come back, come back, come back

Come back, come back, come back for me

Reflections from Week 4…

For: The Institute of Contemporary and Emerging Worship Studies, St. Stephen’s University, Essentials Red Online Worship History Course with Dan Wilt

I can get so inspired by the flowers in the fields and the green trees that move in the wind, with a perfect song to top it off. Driving in my car with the windows down and the melodic sounds that are pouring from my stereo, I sometimes have to remind myself that I am not lying in the grass somewhere staring at the clouds moving by. I love being stirred by nature. My creativity comes from the creations of the first creator. I get a longing to write and play my guitar to reach the climax of my expression and let go.

For me music is the biggest way I express myself. From writing songs to listening to ones already produced, I use music as my release point. Music goes to a deep place within us. The melodies and melodic hooks can take us to such a place that we don’t wanna come back. It’s as if music is the key to secrets in our lives and when united together something special happens. I know if I ask some people around me how music plays a roll in their lives; most likely they will tell me a couple memories tied to a few songs they love. So if music is a key, why not use it to unlock the mysteries the Lord is holding onto.

I love going to art museums and shows. The different canvases that people produce from their heart are really neat to see. To see the journey their heart had to travel in order to express itself, is powerful. I have also been to a couple church services where people were painting while worship was going on and for me, looking at art from other people opens up new places in my heart for me to relate a little bit to them with emotions I may not have known how to release.

I like to express my “Soul Language” as Dan would call it, through music and share it with people and maybe we could go on a journey together of happiness and celebration or traveling through the woods to find the sun beams lying on the fields. And whether through art or music, they both can unlock the mysteries and secret places within and bring us a whole new freedom.

Reflections from Week 3…

For: The Institute of Contemporary and Emerging Worship Studies, St. Stephen’s University, Essentials Red Online Worship History Course with Dan Wilt

This week kind of took a different turn for me.  It has brought me to really think and discover the purpose of the Eucharist and Baptism.  I grew up never thinking twice about why we did things in church, we just did them.  Yes, there have been moments in my life when taking communion or baptism really hits me and creates tenderness in my heart, but there are also other moments where it hasn’t.  Perhaps maybe that comes from a place in my heart that needs to become humble again with the Lord.

Here is a thought, when you take communion, there is confession and remembering that Jesus died for your sins and baptism is the same, you give your life to Christ and become baptized as a sign of the old nature washing away.  You are surrendering your life to Christ.  Communion could almost be a new way of washing your sins away, with the blood of the lamb.  Maybe this is a new way for me to think about it.  Now that my thinking has been stirred on not forgetting why we do the Eucharist of Baptism, I am taking it to more of a personal level.

In one of our church services, the pastor talked about surrender and to not forget what Christ did on the cross.  At the end the worship team came back up to play and our pastor challenged us to really take a look at the cross and grab hold of the value, to do a heart check.  We had a moment of silence before the band played and when you were ready, you stood and said, “Jesus, I will not forget what you did for me on the cross”, then walked up and got your communion pieces at the front.  That was very powerful, to put your pride down and bring yourself to a humble point before the Lord and publicly confess.

Jesus, I will not forget what you’ve done for me on the Cross!

Reflections from Week 2…

For: The Institute Of Contemporary And Emerging Worship Studies, St. Stephen’s University, Essentials Red Online – Spring ‘09 Worship Theology Course with Dan Wilt

This week has sparked a new flame in me.  As I was reading the posts from others on the discussion question and the articles in our packets…I cried inside.  The times in our church services where scripture was read and prayers said, I sometimes tuned out.  I would take the, “This is what you do in church, you pray and read a few scriptures”, kind of approach.  Kind like there was an agenda to our Sundays and forgetting “Who” it was for.

When hearing from Dan that the earlier church really made scripture and pray a priority and it was part of their lives, made me sad of the selfishness inside of me.  I mean come on the Munks lived to read scripture, sing songs and pray to God.  They did chores everyday but, those took second place.  They sacrificed their lives to know the things of God, they valued God on such a high level and expressed their gratitude everyday.  Listening to that made me realize, they understood what God was about, they understood what their response was…to live a life devoted to Him.

How much time do I sacrifice in reading the scripture and praying?  Do I really make it apart of my live, something I live for?  I feel really broken thinking about the times I just wanted to sleep in more than get up and spend time with God.  How much of me have I kept from God?  How much of my heart have I not expressed?  I didn’t realize how much this class would, ‘Do a work”, in me.  Reading the material and listening to the Videos has really made me evaluate my life as a worshiper.

I thought that I will just learn a bit of history and shove it in my back pocket as knowledge, but I didn’t realize that the Lord would speak to me and stir things in me.  Sure I can share all the things that I have learned about others who have gone before on how they expressed their worship and how neat it has been learning it all…but I think that what I am finding out is that all the aspects of worshiping the Lord, whether reading the word, praying or singing songs, has not been a GREAT sacrifice as it should be.  It needs to always ring in my heart.  My expressions need to take priority over everything else in my life.

…Lord, I am sorry for the times that I have taken my time to spend with you in your word and prayer for granted.  I have made my own selfish things higher than you.  Come do a work in me, breathe upon me and burn a new desire for you.

Now I feel a new song coming on…

Reflections from week 1…

For: The Institute Of Contemporary And Emerging Worship Studies, St. Stephen’s University, Essentials Red Online – Spring ‘09 Worship Theology Course with Dan Wilt

This week has been challenging and exciting at the same time.  In reading all the material and listening to the videos, it has caused me to re-think, step back and look from a different perspective into this thing we call worship!

I have always had a heart for worship and thought of it as just me being me, but I have never really thought about the different ways in which people can worship.  The article ‘Worship: Yesterday, Today and Forever’ stuck out to me the most.  The section that was titled ‘Worship Expressions are Ethnically shaped’, talked about how worship expressions will be different from country to country…as long as Jesus is the content of those worship expressions.

This made me think of times where I have looked at people and their walk with the Lord and sat there analyzing what they did to express themselves to God or how they spent their time and how they opened up to Him.  I kind of had a brain fade and took a step back and thought, ‘what is the difference on how I express myself to the Lord and how someone else does?’  What makes my way the “Correct” way to fully express myself to the Lord.  If you are not raising your hands as high as you can and screaming out to God, then you must not want Him bad enough.  You must not care or really get it…so I thought.

It doesn’t matter ‘How’ one worships, how high they raise their hands.  How many tears you cry into a Kleenex or let run down your face.  It doesn’t matter if you are in a grocery store and get the chance to minster to someone in line or if you make a trip to a different country and minister.  It doesn’t matter whether you make a special room with candles and incense to pray and worship the Lord or you are driving in your car somewhere.  It’s all the same right?  As long as our hearts are turned to Him…express yourself however you want!

I could go on forever, I guess these articles and different thought processes has sparked something in me!

Hello!

This is my new Intern Blog.

It will be updated as i travel along this exciting road to where the Lord takes me.

So enjoy being driven along into a place where i am constantly changing for Christ!